I Keep On Loving You
by Grantx752
Summary: Mellie's explanation for why she keeps on loving her husband throughout all that they have been through


A lot of the time, she finds other people asking her why she is possibly still with Fitz. Why, after his affairs, after the way he treats her, after he's told her openly that he wanted to divorce her, did she still love him? Even her own child has asked her that question. Actually, she'd found herself asking that question plenty of times. To everyone around her, her answer never seemed to make any sense, but to herself, the answer was completely understandable.

She never knew what was around the corner, if Fitz would come to his right mind and realize how much Mellie loved him, how much she had truly sacrificed for him, and how much she will continue to sacrifice for him. Faith is the belief in something more than what you know. And Mellie had faith in their marriage. Even after so many years of their cold, dead marriage, after so many fights and sleepless nights, she had faith in their marriage. She had to play the cards that she already had in her hand and work with that. She had to work with her marriage and pray that eventually, everything would work out as planned, that at some point, it would get better. Sometimes you have to go without knowing where you're going.

They've had their share of fights, bad fights, especially after the night with Big Jerry. He had spent plenty of time yelling at her, telling her how terrible of a wife she was and how she wouldn't let him touch her, and how she ruined their marriage because she was a cold, heartless, dried-up bitch. They'd had their share of sleepless nights, lying in bed, feet apart with their backs toward one another. Fitz would listen to her sniffle and cry, and as much as he wanted to pull her into his arms and apologize, he was too stubborn to do so. They've had their share of ups and downs, of one of them swearing that they were gone, that they were done with the other. But they would always find their way back to each other. Sometimes, she swears it would be easier to throw in the towel. But someday, she swears to herself, they're gonna look back and say, "Look at us now".

She loved that man to pieces. She always had. And she knew that somewhere deep inside of him, he still loved her as well. Of course, he had Olivia now, and he was in love with her, but Mellie knew that he still loved her, even if he didn't want to admit it, even if he wanted to pretend that he didn't. She knew her husband. If he didn't care, he would've tried harder to divorce her. He wouldn't apologize after their fights. He cared. Even if he didn't want to, he cared. Fitz wasn't the type of person to be able to be married to someone for so long and just get over them. Fitz wasn't the type of person to throw away the love of his life, which he hated to admit, was Mellie, not Olivia.

That's why she keeps on loving him. For the future. She gets passed the past, forgets about it all, and she keeps on loving him, through everything. Through the, "Baby, don't leave me"s, and the "never will again"s, and "I promise to"s. She pushes past the hurt and the pain that he's put her through and she remembers why she fell in love with him. She keeps on loving him, through the "I take it back"s, "I didn't mean it like that"s, "I'd never hurt you"s. She fights for the future that they have, once he gets over Olivia and realizes how much she really loves him and how much he means to her. She has to keep trying until there's absolutely nothing to try for anymore. She has to keep fighting for her man because there's a chance. There's a chance for them, even after everything they've been through. She keeps hoping for a breakthrough, for them to come out stronger than ever, because you never know what's in store for you.

Through his painful words, and his slams against her as a wife and as a mother. She knows that most of the time, he doesn't mean that. He's just angry and he's always acted on impulse. Usually, he apologizes for acting like that, and most of the time, that's enough for her. That's enough for her to get through with. Even after so many years of them 'hating' each other and treating one another with such hatred, they both love one another. They know that because if they didn't, they wouldn't have held on this long. Fitz would've pushed harder for a divorce, Mellie would have just let him go. But they can't do that. Not yet, possibly not ever. Their relationship isn't normal, not in the least. It's rocky, and it's rough, and it's hanging on by a thread, but it's still their relationship. It's still them, it's still, "You and me", as Fitz would say. It's still worth it, even if just a little bit. There's always that small chance that everything will fix itself and that they can start to fix their marriage, that they can get back to the old them, to the 'them' from before the night that her innocence was taken from her. Things are tough, in fact they're at their worst. But she's a fighter, and he's her husband. She's made mistakes, but she's convinced that she's going to fix them. He's not the only one that had screwed up, she drove him away.

Love is patient. She just needs to wait, to play every card she had in her hand, and see where that gets her. She can't give up, because there's a chance that things will get better, that she will have her husband back and they can be as close as they once were. Giving up is not an option, so she keeps fighting. She keeps fighting for a dead marriage and for a husband that is in love with another woman.

She sucks it up and she keeps on loving him because that's what she needs to do.


End file.
